Saturday, August 20, 2011

Teaser for Chapter 18 of Bitemarks & Bloodstains

You couldn't have done me a favor and gotten Carlisle on board so I don't have to?” I ask, wrinkling my nose in distaste at the prospect of having to have another conversation with him.

You'll live,” Bella replies dryly as she pats my chest twice, and we fall into a comfortable silence that doesn't last nearly long enough as we walk through the woods on our way back toward the house with the silent understanding laying between us that we're going to have to start talking to people about this possibility. It's more of an understanding that I'm going to have to start talking to the others.

I am beyond pleased when the house turns out to be empty, save for Esme.

Why do you like her, more than the others?” Bella asks.

It's surprising, the way that she can pick something that I consider completely shrouded out of the air and slap me in the face with it. “She's... Esme is real. She doesn't try to hide behind what she thinks the world views her as, and she doesn't pander to anyone. What you see is what you get.”

You know, you said something similar about my Dad once,” Bella comments, and I'd never actually seen that parallel until she pointed it out. Charlie and Esme, they're actually a lot alike.

I never realized how much they have in common,” I muse aloud.

Me either. You ready for this?”

Nope, but that seldom stops me.”

Now that, I had noticed,” Bella says with a laugh, and she grabs my left hand with her right and forcibly leads me toward the house. “Will you just relax? It's not like Esme is going to judge you for whatever notions run through that crazy head of yours.”

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Top 25 Things that annoy the fuck out of us in a Jasper/Bella fic! By @frthelongestday & @JaspersIzzy

Top 25 Things that annoy the fuck out of us in a Jasper/Bella fic!
By forthelongestday and JaspersIzzy

Not because stories that use these elements are bad, but that they are so overdone that it’s getting old. Don’t take offense to this, because honestly, we've done most of this shit ourselves, but that being said, we can be more creative than this. And we don't need to bitch when it's not there.

1. He's always called the Major, because he's so badass. (He's not cool enough for General though)
2. He always has to be badass and can never be insecure about himself.
3. Peter and Charlotte always have to be in the story as his trusty, worshipping sidekicks.
4. Bella is always Jasper's mate and they know it only when Edward and Alice are out of the picture.
5. That he’s insecure about his scars.
6. He’s always possessive, and won't let anyone near Bella or he'll “go all Major on their asses”.
7. He always drives a truck or a motorcycle. He's too cool for a car or a heaven forbid a minivan.
8. He has to have a southern accent that is meticulously written out.
9. That he never loved Alice at all, even though she saved his ass.
10. He’s always called the God of War.
11. That Bella’s blood doesn’t call to him after they fuck.
12. Peter has to be his best friend, who bows down to him like he's... (gasp) the God of War.
13. Alice has to be evil, unless Edward is. Well shit, they usually are both evil together.
14. Even though he's all the above, he still puts together a date so romantic that Bella gives up her v-card.
15. Hobbies include: Riding horses and playing guitar.
16. He always knows what he's doing, and he's always right. Duh, because Jasper is badass, smart, sexy, wise, and apparently psychic.
17. The Major takes his Mate. Immediately. Dominantly. Kinkily. And she likes it.
18. Bella is always immediately in love with him, even though they don't know each other.
19. Carlisle will always give up his place as head of the family, because Jasper is so bad ass, no one can rule over him.
20. He always calls Bella Darlin'.
21. Peter always knows shit, and he always has to be a funny, snarky asshole. Dude, can never just… be.
22. Bella suddenly came down with the Vixen Syndrome and becomes a tigeress in bed, even as a virgin. And she always, always comes.
23. Jasper always wears cowboy boots.
24. Bella and Peter become instant BFF’s, like they grew up in the same sand box.
25. Jasper’s dicks is bigger than the space needle, but it always seems to fit.

Seriously, this is just for fun. Don’t be offended by any of this. If you can’t laugh about it, you are taking it too seriously. It’s just fan fiction.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Manip - Adventurella (I don't know...)

Manip - Smexxy Peter for @JaspersIzzy

Had this one for a while, but I didn't want to post it until she figured out what she wanted to do with it.  :-)

Manip - Bikersper part 2

Teaser for Chapter 17 of Bitemarks & Bloodstains

So what's the deal, you tired of fighting with me?” I prod, and the corner of Bella's lip quirks upward.

Not at all. Emmett keeps trying to give me love advice, and Esme won't let me punch him in the house. This seemed like a good solution.”

How do you know Emmett is gonna win?” I ask, even though I'm pretty sure he will, too.

I don't, but if Alice beats him, he'll call winner on our bout. I can take Alice.”

You are so deliciously devious.” I press a kiss to her hair and allow my focus to drift back to the match.

It's not long before Emmett's chest is puffed out with pride and confidence, and Bella makes slow and easy strides into the middle of the yard. Emmett's got this little smirk on his face and his posture is far too relaxed. He's not taking her seriously, so I guess it can't be said that Emmett's not going to learn anything today; he and everyone else are about to find out just how good Bella is.

I chuckle a little when I warn him, “You might not wanna go easy on her. She almost broke my arm the first time I took her out.”

I think I can handle it,” Emmett replies as he rolls his eyes at me—but what Emmett doesn't realize is that I'm the one who taught Bella how to fight, and the first thing I told her was to never, ever take her eyes off her opponent. She uses Emmett's momentary distraction to launch herself straight at him, and the look on his face when he realizes that his little sister is about to take him down is priceless.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

O/S - All These Years

 All These Years - Emmett/Bella
The lie starts with a bad break-up and too many drinks—or maybe that's where it ends.  "You only want what you can't have..."

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Friday, August 5, 2011

Manip - Bikersper (I like to make up names...)

Teaser for Chapter 16 of Bitemarks & Bloodstains

She may be your girlfriend, but she's my sister,” Emmett throws back, and that's when it hits me.

Oh, fuck. She's my girlfriend, isn't she?” I don't know why I never thought of it before, we've never really sought out a definition like that. I'd never even considered the possibility of labels, and it makes me a little uneasy, because I have no idea if Bella has, or whether or not she's upset that I haven't shown the slightest indication of caring. “I've never had a girlfriend before.”

Wow, I wish I had a camera,” Emmett snickers, feeling immensely cheered up by my current dilemma.


Because that look on your face should be shared with the world.” Emmett chuckles for a few moments before getting it together enough to say, “So let me get this straight. You're sleeping with her. You absolutely crazy about her. You're okay with telling us all to fuck off because you don't like sharing, and you're totally cool with the idea of being with her forever—but it's that she's your girlfriend that throws you for a loop?”

It sounds so much more deranged when you say it like that.”

You're fucking crazy. She's your girlfriend, Jasper. Deal with it.” Emmett looks like he's done talking about this, but then he surprises me by adding, “And by the way, will you just tell her that you love her already? Today's my day in the pool.”

There's so much to absorb from that one little statement, but for some reason the part I focus on is, “You've been betting on us?!”

No.” Emmett smirks. “Just you.”
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